If you can honestly tell me that the first words that come to mind are NOT an expletive combo when you see this picture and think that they can be up to three disgusting inches long, then props to you.
As for me and my cicada killer-infested house*, WHAT THE HELL?!?
And, no, I'm not joking. They're really called cicada killer wasps (Sphecius speciosus). Why, you ask? Because the delightful females hunt cicadas and paralyze them with their sting so they can drag them back to their 6-10 inch burrow and deposit them in cells with their laid eggs. They are slightly feminist, though, because female eggs get two cicadas each while male eggs only get one. (Which does beg the question of how you tell a cicada killer female egg from a cicada killer male egg, but I think that's a question to ask your parents.) The eggs hatch within two days and the larvae begin feasting on the live but paralyzed cicadas until they are ready to form a cocoon.
I realize that cicadas can be deafeningly loud and quite annoying and run into your windows and that nothing rivals the tasty crunch when you step on a dead one, but who deserves to be eaten while conscious but paralyzed? Sounds like What Lies Beneath meets Silence of the Lambs, if you ask me.
The only question that remains in my mind is why did I ever leave Colorado? There's nothing like this in my blessed Rocky Mountain home. I've already had nightmares about the two house centipedes** I've seen here (image below, and in case you're wondering, it was the epic battle of house centipede vs. spider), so I'm psyching myself out for the horrors to come.
*They're only outside and I've only seen a few, so I'm not so sure numbers-wise if that counts as an infestation, but total mass-wise it most definitely does.
**The first time I saw one it was running toward me on the floor. I squealed and yelled to Ben, "It's a...a...A MONSTER!" Although arguably a less than articulate moment, I still can't think of a better way to describe them.
A blog post about one of my three reasons for leaving DC. I can't stand big freaky bugs. The only solace about the cicada killers is that they don't go after people (because I think they are big enough to paralyze me!). The centipedes are horrible...monsters to be sure. And then there's the roaches, another critter I never saw back in sweet home Colorado. May we both move back one day, or at least to a similar climate that doesn't produce such beasts!
ReplyDeleteThe centipede, yes, I know it well. Back before I bought a handful of laundry bins to solve this problem, whenever I'd let the laundry go too long and there was some (read: a lot) of it on the basement floor, I'd pick up an article or two to begin sorting and a centipede would take off on its windy path, realizing that its hiding place has been compromised. *shudder* As for those wasps...terrible, just terrible. Had no idea.
ReplyDeleteI'll keep my fingers crossed about Colorado for both of us, Ginger! I am intrigued, though, as to what your other two reasons for leaving DC were.
ReplyDeleteI feel for you, Emily. I think I'd have to go to some serious shock therapy if some had popped out of my clothes.
heat/humidity and crime
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