I've been opting to take the shuttle to school. As is often the case in Baltimore, some crazy driver tried to pull off some insane stunt, nearly causing a crash. I wasn't in the shuttle when this happened, but I was able to hear the story approximately three times on my round-trip ride (same driver). Following the last recount of the story, this conversation ensued:
Driver: It's all these Similac and Enfamil babies causing these problems.
Passenger: What?
Driver: I tell you, I was raised on Carnation and everything in my brain is tight, but those crack babies on Similac and Enfamil have all kinds of craaazy bidnass going on in their brains and they just can't think straight. They try, yes they sure try, but it's mighty hard to get anywhere with a 16 IQ. Bless 'em for trying, though. It's still a miracle they're even allowed to operate a vehicle. You know what's in that Similac and Enfamil garbage? All sorts of metals and drugs. Can't be good.
Passenger: I just read that people who are fed breast milk actually have the highest IQs.
Driver: Really? That's CRAZY. That don't seem right.
Passenger: Yeah, I was sh!t shocked.
Oddly enough, I was sh!t shocked, too.
It provided a better context, though, for their earlier conversation about how Sheila Dixon (our fantastic mayor who steals donated gift cards intended for needy families) shouldn't be put in jail but should be forced to apologize and do community service.
*another reason to not let your kids do ballet
OH MY WORD. Oh. My. Word. Ohmyword.
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Oh shoot, I forgot (so utterly flabbergasted the first time I commented) - I'm so sorry about your back!!! I hope you get back to feeling less harpooned and stabbed and such real soon.
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